30 going on 13 || Bachelor Audition // Edition
- karlysue
- Jan 16, 2015
- 7 min read
A clip from my Bachelor audition video.
(Watch in HD)
I know what you are thinking.
You’re thinking, (insert heart-eyes/smiley-face emoji) "Wow. Karly is so…… talented, athletic, artsy, youthful, spunky, so so cut, musical, attractive, and her ponytail is just like, dang. She talks a little fast, but wow... she is so neato."
It’s okay. I’ve thought the same thing too…like, "How did I get so blessed? I'm just so.... paid."
Okay, OR... you might be thinking, “oh Karly...you are one cocky piece of $#%^. (sorry mom) Hhhwhat exactly were you thinking?”
The truth? ..I thought my mediocre athletic skills and my ridiculous sense of humor were going to get my mug on tv. I also thought my squats were noteworthy, even though I can actually squat at least 6x the amount I was lifting in the video. What’s even more embarrassing is on top of that, I didn’t audition for the show just once. No, that video was from 2+ years ago. Since then, I’ve gotten much better looking and much cooler, so last July I figured why not show up in person this time and give it another shot at the casting call in Chicago. No way would they deny me again if they got to see me in real life. I’d melt their little hearts!
So, I would like to think that I’m pretty funny. If you ask me, I’m one of the funniest people I know. You also need to take about 10% of what I say seriously. For those who hang out with me long enough, you begin to notice that I laugh the hardest when I think I’m funny and am able to get the people around me to laugh. I may or may not even laugh at myself when no one is around and am reminded of things I’ve said that were just… wow-worthy. It’s very normal, don’t worry.
At the same time though, I would also like to think that I’m pretty fun to hang out with too. At least that’s what people tell me. So bearing that in mind, and knowing ahead of time that the casting crew was looking for bubbly and outgoing personalities, I went into the interview with a reasonable amount of confidence. And for the record, the first time around, I sent in my video past the deadline, (very unlike me) so that hardly even counts. But seriously, I really had nothing to lose.
Whelp, unfortunately the guy who interviewed me didn’t get the full "karlysue" experience. He hardly saw the tip of the iceberg. He saw more of an ice cube. I freaking froze. I would actually compare the way I portrayed myself to about as exciting as a dry piece of gluten-free toast. Like, you know it’s not bad for you, but there’s no butter or jam to distract you from the bland cardboardy taste. I mean, who says in an interview for a dating show that her dating history is nothing too exciting? Way to sell your story, Karly.
I walked out of the interview just laughing at myself and shaking my head…. gahh.
So typical. So ridiculous. So Karly. #shegone
I’m still pretty sure they just lost my number though. That’s the only reason I could think of as to why they still haven't called me. Needless to say, the show has gone on without me, and ironically enough, there is a karly with a C in the mix.. but come.. on.. really. No comparison. ;)
All jokes aside, bottom line is this: who ever gets it right the first time? God knows I haven’t. I’ve done it wrong so many freaking times. Unfortunately, that is typically the way I learn best. I mess up and mess up and try again and try to do better the next time.
You know in high school when you asked your teacher for a hall pass to go to the bathroom, but you both knew that you really just needed a break, she winks at you, pretends like she doesn't know, and writes you a pass anyways? Oh, if only I had a few hall passes to use; a chance to rewind, try again, and have all the parties involved look at you and say, (insert winky-face emoji) “its okay, karlysue... it never happened."
So much of life is trial and error. You gotta take chances sometimes. That's how you grow. You’ll never know if you never try. If you're not making mistakes, you're not growing. Be attentive to the lesson that can be learned. Take a freaking risk. When you mess up, say you’re freaking sorry. Own up to your freaking mistake. Freaking forgive. Freaking move forward. Try a freaking new approach. Freaking get over yourself.
Messing up is humbling. God also knows I need a little of that sometimes. It's a reality check though, and a reminder that we are human and we can’t do life on our own. We need guidance. We need wisdom. We need grace. There comes a point when you realize you need something more. You need something bigger.
See, what's cool is that we actually do have access to hall passes if we want them. God so generously and lovingly offers us multiple hall passes everyday. He is all about 2nd, 3rd, 50+ chances if we just ask for them. And what's even better is that not only does He give us another try to do things right, He also tells us which way to go in His Word. It never seizes to amaze me, that when I finally admit to myself that I can't do it alone, God uses just the right person, or words He places in front of me, to speak to my heart and give me just the wisdom, guidance, and grace that I need at just the right time. He is so intentional and detailed like that.
Not too long ago I read this excerpt from the book Jesus Calling, and it really hit home for me:
"Life is a faith-walk, taken one step at a time, leaning on Me (God) as much as you need. This is not a path of continual success but of multiple failures. However, each failure is followed by a growth spurt, nourished by increased reliance on Me. Enjoy the blessedness of a victorious life, through deepening your dependence on Me."
So, in honor of me growing up on my birfday and all the love I have received, I am feeling quite generous. Even though I am 30, most of you know by now that I have the sense of humor of a 13-year-old. And like I said before, so much of life is trial and error, well, so it is with products. You figure out what works and doesn't work, for you, for your hair, and for your lifestyle. So, I am going to share #MessyDo Tip #2, along with my top 13 "go-to" products that have transformed my game and have really taken me to the next level. After discovering these things fairly recently, I’d say my game is so strong that my chances of being selected for the NEXT season of The Bachelor are just so so good.
TOP 13 “GO-TO” PRODUCTS:
(each are linked)
Bumble and Bumble || Thickening Full Form Mousse: Best root boost I have found hands down. I get just the lift and volume that I need at the root of my hair.
Big Sexy Hair || Play and Play Harder: If you don’t want your hair goin nowhere, this is the stuff. I spray only the roots of my hair after teasing and my hair stays all day.
The Wet Brush: You may wonder how I manage to brush through my messy hair without doing major damage. I brush my hair in the shower with conditioner in it with The Wet Brush. Saves me from a lot of potential pain and split ends.
Lululemon Yoga Pants: These speak for themselves. They hug me in the right places, they are extremely versatile, and so so comfy.
Bumble and Bumble || Pret-a-powder Dry Shampoo Powder: It is very difficult to get texture in your hair immediately after you wash it. This stuff is more than just dry shampoo- it thickens and adds volume to the roots , and I rub it at the roots of my hair even when it is clean, right after I dry it. It makes teasing much easier too because it gives the hair more grip.
ProGrade Protein Powder: For all the squats that I do, I don’t want my workouts going to waste. This protein is high quality, low carb, and uses natural ingredients that help feed and refuel my muscles efficiently.
PB2: Best invention ever. You can throw it in protein shakes, or I combine it with Fage Plain Greek Yogurt+Blueberries+Chia seeds, and together there is so much protein, fiber, and nutrients, and it tastes so good.
Trish Mccevoy High Volume Mascara: Best mascara I have found… and I have tried them all. Doesn’t smudge, easily buildable, and adds volume and length to the lashes.
Crest Whitestrips: I am super anal about my teeth and I drink a lot of coffee. These guys keep my teeth white and pearly:)
Nars Paloma Contour Kit: Whatever you do, don’t drown your face with bronzer. Learn how to contour + highlight. This draws attention to the correct features in a more natural and subtle way.
Estee Lauder Double Wear Stay-in-Place Flawless Wear Concealer: Dab this under your eye to brighten and define your eye. It stays all day and even survives a tough workout.
Estee Lauder Skin Care: This skincare line has helped my skin stay looking so young and fresh!
7-8 hours of sleep at night: I did not realize how deprived I was until I started intentionally sleeping more. I have so much more energy when I sleep well, I’m more productive, and I so rarely catch a cold even with coughing students surrounding me all day because my immune system is so strong.
Let me know what you think of these, and stay tuned for the next #MessyDo tip as I elaborate on exactly HOW to use some of these products!
And, of course:
....cheers to my new life motto #yoyo (You're Only Young Once) and to the BIG 3-0 for KO! #dirtythirty
**Shout out to the stuntman in the video, Dane Olson, who flung his body all over the concrete just to make me look good, and to the camera woman, Kristin Stockfisch! They were troopers, and thankfully no one got injured too badly during filming. ;)
